Jan
17
    
Posted (Chris) in General on January-17-2007


According to Weather.com it’s snowing down South of us.

Well, uh, no, I don’t think so. I just talked to Stephanie and it’s sunny outside. Cold as hell, but sunny.



 
Jan
17
    
Posted (Chris) in Funnies (ha ha) on January-17-2007



 
Jan
16
    
Posted (Chris) in Funnies (ha ha) on January-16-2007

Jack wakes up with a HUGE hangover after a night at a business function. He forces himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And next to them, a single red rose.?? Jack sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order and spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror and notices a note on the table: “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!”

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, “Son….what happened last night?”

“Well, you came home at 3 a.m., drunk and out of your mind. You broke the coffee table, puked in the hallway and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”??

“So why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?”

His son replies, “Oh, THAT! …. Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, “Leave me alone, bitch, I’m married!!!!”

Thanks to katal for that beaut!



 
Jan
12
    
Posted (Chris) in Geeky on January-12-2007

Get your Apple phone now!



 
Jan
11
    
Posted (Chris) in Funnies (ha ha) on January-11-2007

A great video from Bunny to the SNL video of My Dick in a Box



 
Jan
10
    
Posted (Chris) in Funnies (ha ha), Geeky on January-10-2007

IBM Field service memo regarding the replacement of faulty mouse balls:

____________________________________________________________
MEMO
Re: Replacement of Mouse Balls.
If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Units). Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.
Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method. Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off method. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge. Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately.
It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.
Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an unhappy customer.



 
Jan
09
    
Posted (Chris) in Funnies (ha ha) on January-9-2007

I’m glad I don’t know anyone who laughs like this, I couldn’t never be around them!



 
Jan
08
    
Posted (Chris) in Geeky on January-8-2007


 
Jan
08
    
Posted (Chris) in Sports on January-8-2007

for publishing a positive article. I especially love the first line about the lights being on, considering Trevor Aaronson’s article about the electric bill.

From today’s Commercial Appeal

‘Kings return home with victory
By Chris Van Tuyl
January 8, 2007

RiverKings 3, RAYZ 2

The lights were on at the DeSoto Civic Center Sunday and Memphis continued its winning ways in the Central Hockey League.

The RiverKings scored early and hung tough late to post a 3-2 victory over Corpus Christi. Memphis, which was playing its third game in as many nights, improved to 22-6-3. The triumph allowed Kevin McClelland’s club to match last season’s victory total, with 33 games remaining.

Read the rest here



 
Jan
05
    
Posted (Chris) in Rants, Sports on January-5-2007